When struggling with the decision of learning the baby’s sex, many parents-to-be consider whether or not finding out the sex of your baby will make for a bad baby shower. Does it really?
Generally, I think humans like predictability. That’s why we look for patterns, make routines and search for meaning in everything, and it’s no different with birth. As soon as it was possible to predict a baby’s sex during pregnancy, most women flocked to take advantage. Everyone has their own reasoning for choosing not to find out or reveal the sex of their baby ahead of time, but pregnant families often go through multiple phases of making that decision. At some point, many parents-to-be wonder if finding out the sex of your baby makes for a bad baby shower. Will you leave with boring gifts? Does it mean there’s absolutely no personalization? Are your friends and family members bothered by not knowing? Eventually, you’ll realize it doesn’t matter. Keeping the secret isn’t about the baby shower (or about THEM), it’s about the excitement of meeting your baby for the first time.
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The Pros and Cons of Not Finding Out the Sex of your Baby
There’s really only one con to not finding out the sex of your baby ahead of time: not knowing. Some people can handle that anticipation. Others can not only handle it but truly love the surprise. Personally, I’m too much of a planner to not know.
On the other hand, as one mom writes, it’s nice to keep ONE thing to yourself. Whether it’s because you didn’t want to know or because you didn’t want to share, the sex of your baby could be one of the only things in your life to remain a secret. Enjoy it. In fact, make a bet out of it. What better game for a baby shower than betting on the sex of your unborn child so you can start a college fund before they’re even born? Plus, you’ll never have a bad baby shower when there are gift involved. You won’t get dozens of cliché gender-specific outfits and instead be given gift cards, books, strollers or other things you may actually need.
Ultimately, finding the sex of your baby doesn’t matter, much like choosing a gender neutral name doesn’t matter.
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What to Buy for a Gender Neutral Baby Shower
Loving the idea of not finding out the sex of your baby ahead of time? Here are a few great baby shower gifts that are both cute and useful:
- Diapers – Everyone underestimates what a useful baby shower gift this is!
- Clothing and Blanket Basics – Instead of traditional cliché boy or girl clothing in shades of pink and blue, guests can branch out to purchase other colors, like mauve, rust or olive! Everyone loves buying baby clothes, so at least this way they give you more useful options, like superior basics and soft swaddles and blankets that are about the quality, not just the outward gender appearance.
- Big-Ticket Items – Having a baby is expensive. Helping parents-to-be by pooling money to purchase big ticket items like strollers, car seats, cribs and breast pumps will help them more than gender-specific toys would.
- Diaper Bag – The diaper bag is more about the parents than the baby! Choose something in a color, pattern or style that will make the mom happy. It’s completely separate from the sex of the baby.
- Gift Cards – Sometimes, a gift card is all they want! I know, I know. It doesn’t feel special or heartfelt to give a gift card, but truthfully, it’s what everyone really want.
Did you find out the sex of your baby before birth? Tell us what your gender neutral baby shower was like!